If you find yourself plagued with fears, perfectionism or doubt while pursuing your goals, you may be going after goals that aren’t right for you.
You see, it’s easy to let others create your goals. However, this can also hinder your ability to find the energy and passion needed to accomplish whatever objectives you’re trying to reach. So you must set your own goals.
Here’s a simple way to do this:
When you first define a goal, don’t focus on the goal itself. Instead, focus on why you’re setting that goal. When you take this approach, you make choices that are more aligned with who you are and what you want from your time. Focusing on your “why” gets you to the core of your energy and passion, and is the true underlying for your goal.
For example, say you have a goal to be more socially active. This is your “what,” and it’s a good goal. So let’s imagine it’s a cold, dark, rainy winter night. You had a long, slow commute home. You planned to go out to a new Meetup group.
But by the time you finally get home, you feel too tired, cold and grumpy to even consider going back out again. You say to yourself, “What’s the point? No one is expecting me.” Your “what” question should be replaced with a “why” question, such as “Why should I go out?”
Because if you do go out, you have the chance to establish new relationships, which has the potential to lead to great things. Those connections could turn into friendships and those friendships could turn into professional or social opportunities.
Again, your “what” is to be socially active. Your “why” is to have access to opportunities.
So now you’re motivated and your intentions are clear.
The fact is, when you know why you’re pursuing a goal, this clarifies your thinking and intentions. Having this focus helps you access the energy and passion you need to succeed.
Something else to remember …
What you energize lives, what you feed grows and what you starve dies.
If you want to be an athlete, you need to spend time and energy working out and practicing.
If your goal is to get good grades, you need to hit the books and learn.
If you want to start a profitable business, you need to understand the basics, have a strong business foundation and platform, and, finally, focus on the three P’s -- People, Process and Product.
When people set goals, they are often overambitious with lofty aspirations. For example, someone might say, “I will lose 50 pounds in less than six weeks.”
Yet it’s difficult to see progress when you set yourself up with a single large goal without smaller checkpoints to make sure you’re on the right path. Lack of progress or pressure to meet an artificial deadline kills motivation.
Your goals should be small stepping stones on the path to a successful conclusion. Instead of focusing on the end state -- lose 50 pounds in six weeks -- consider setting goals around the steps necessary to reach that end state.
For instance, “I will walk 15 minutes a day.” Once you consistently hit this goal, you jump to the next step -- “I will walk 30 minutes a day.” And so on.
The point is, your desire is the “why” or the reason you want to set any goals at all. Get clear on why you want to set a goal. Then build a pathway of what (i.e., what you’re going to do) to get you to what you desire.
Start small and manageable because success breeds confidence and confidence gets things done.